My grandfather passed on today. I knew that something was going to happen this morning and happen it did. I woke up and went to work with a sense of forboding. I was anxious. I couldn’t eat breakfast, I gulped my Starbucks coffee like there was no tomorrow and my blood pressure was through the roof. As the day went by, the sense of forboding increased. I had some issues at work that were hammered out I think but then, I got a phone call from Nate’s daycare. He had a fever of 1o1.3, so I contacted the doctor and took off for daycare. Right as I was pulling into daycare, I got a call from the nurse. I was totally panicked the entire trip over to the daycare center, thinking about how Nate would have Swine Flu, which he probably doesn’t. I probably did the right thing in calling right away because I was told to watch him overnight, give him Motrin and bring him in to the officer tomorrow to be evaluated.
Then, I got home and called my folks because I was reading a novel on Sag Harbor and I wanted to tell them about how I was reading about places that I recognized from the summers that I spent there and my mom burst into tears before I even got to my story, my mom told me how they lost my grandfather. I couldn’t believe it. I spoke to her and held it together, but then they put my grandmother on and I lost it. She sounded so sad. And that’s when I started crying.
I pretty much got it together again. Grieving is really wierd. It kind of hit me, but only because my grandmother was upset, not necessarily because my grandfather died. She was so sad and sounded so tired.